The Comics Curmudgeon

The Comics Curmudgeon https://joshreads.com The Comics Curmudgeon en-US https://wordpress.org/?v=6.8.12 Bad faces https://joshreads.com/2026/11/bad-faces/ Dustin, 11/3/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261103dustin.jpg" />Man, man, I could’ve done without Dustin’s dad’s sheepish little I-did-an-oopsie smile in the last panel here. I don’t really care if this is happening in his subconscious and he’s about to wake up having made a mess of the sheets or if he’s decided to manifest his dreams in real life and this is the incident that finally gets him disbarred at minimum, but he’s clearly getting off on his coworker’s anger and disgust and that shouldn’t be in the funny pages, which are a sacred space for cats who hate Mondays and whatever they have going on in Peanuts reruns these days.Crankshaft, 11/3/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261103shaft.jpg" />Speaking of little smiles I hate, I don’t think Comic Book John should be imprisoned or anything for his facial expression on panel two, but I still don’t care for it. “Ah, the children of today,” he seems to be thinking. “They’re incredibly stupid, as it should be. Only the dumbest of minds will eschew legitimate literature for the moronic capeslop I sell, so this is all good news for me. Sorry about society, I guess.”Marvin, 11/3/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261103marvin.jpg" />Also, Marvin, don’t go outside at all! You are literally a toddler?</div> Crankshaft Dustin Marvin https://joshreads.com/2026/11/bad-faces/#comments https://joshreads.com/?p=49599 Tue, 03 Nov 2026 12:21:22 +0000 Dustin, 11/3/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261103dustin.jpg" />Man, man, I could’ve done without Dustin’s dad’s sheepish little I-did-an-oopsie smile in the last panel here. I don’t really care if this is happening in his subconscious and he’s about to wake up having made a mess of the sheets or if he’s decided to manifest his dreams in real life and this is the incident that finally gets him disbarred at minimum, but he’s clearly getting off on his coworker’s anger and disgust and that shouldn’t be in the funny pages, which are a sacred space for cats who hate Mondays and whatever they have going on in Peanuts reruns these days.Crankshaft, 11/3/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261103shaft.jpg" />Speaking of little smiles I hate, I don’t think Comic Book John should be imprisoned or anything for his facial expression on panel two, but I still don’t care for it. “Ah, the children of today,” he seems to be thinking. “They’re incredibly stupid, as it should be. Only the dumbest of minds will eschew legitimate literature for the moronic capeslop I sell, so this is all good news for me. Sorry about society, I guess.”Marvin, 11/3/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261103marvin.jpg" />Also, Marvin, don’t go outside at all! You are literally a toddler?</div> Deep Barney Google lore, sure, that’s what the kids want https://joshreads.com/2026/11/deep-barney-google-lore-sure-thats-what-the-kids-want/ Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 11/2/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261102bgss.jpg" />Look, I get that they might have been misled by the “racing days” reference, but it’s embarrassing that these two birds have mistaken their fellow avian for a horse. This is just proof that they’re very stupid and, despite their ability to talk in the context of these Barney Google and Snuffy Smith Present … Sparkplug’s Grandson Li’l Sparky strips, it’s actually fine that Snuffy is going to steal them from his neighbors so Loweezy can kill and cook them.Dick Tracy, 11/2/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261102dt.jpg" />I know I’ve recently <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/fingers-crossed-for-some-good-murders-to-come/" target="_blank">celebrated Dick Tracy’s turn back to the macabre</a>, but I have to say the strip may have gone too far today. Streaming media personalities? In the comics? No thanks. Oh also the family appears to have murdered their <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/anyone-is-welcome-to-option-my-writing-and-make-something-god-awful-out-of-it-i-dont-care-anymore/#dt" target="_blank">pinheaded nurse</a>, to cover up their various crimes, I guess.Mother Goose and Grimm, 11/2/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261102mgg.jpg" />I am ignoring whatever joke they’re attempting to implement here, but I do want to point out that it’s now strip canon that the title characters can just drop by the office of Satan, the great Adversary, which is clearly in the depths of Hell itself, whenever they feel like. Not sure if we’re meant to understand that they have the power to move back and forth across the veil that separates the worlds of the living and the dead, or if they in fact inhabit Hell full time themselves, and the various misadventures we see them get into represent some kind of ironic punishment tailored specifically for them, due to their sins.Mary Worth, 11/2/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261102maryworth.jpg" />It’s day 17 of the siege by various law enforcement agencies that began when Mary <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/11/excited-for-mary-worth-to-get-kafka-seque/#mary" target="_blank">hung Nelly Fenele’s flayed skin</a> on the gates of Charterstone as a warning to those who would dare betray her. The feds thought it would take only a few days for the hungry residents to turn on the woman the media is calling “The Butcher of Santa Royale,” but the produce from the Charterstone garden has so far been enough to keep everyone loyal. Thank goodness for mild California weather!</div> Barney Google & Snuffy Smith Dick Tracy Mary Worth Mother Goose and Grimm https://joshreads.com/2026/11/deep-barney-google-lore-sure-thats-what-the-kids-want/#comments https://joshreads.com/?p=49594 Mon, 02 Nov 2026 12:21:30 +0000 Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 11/2/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261102bgss.jpg" />Look, I get that they might have been misled by the “racing days” reference, but it’s embarrassing that these two birds have mistaken their fellow avian for a horse. This is just proof that they’re very stupid and, despite their ability to talk in the context of these Barney Google and Snuffy Smith Present … Sparkplug’s Grandson Li’l Sparky strips, it’s actually fine that Snuffy is going to steal them from his neighbors so Loweezy can kill and cook them.Dick Tracy, 11/2/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261102dt.jpg" />I know I’ve recently <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/fingers-crossed-for-some-good-murders-to-come/" target="_blank">celebrated Dick Tracy’s turn back to the macabre</a>, but I have to say the strip may have gone too far today. Streaming media personalities? In the comics? No thanks. Oh also the family appears to have murdered their <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/anyone-is-welcome-to-option-my-writing-and-make-something-god-awful-out-of-it-i-dont-care-anymore/#dt" target="_blank">pinheaded nurse</a>, to cover up their various crimes, I guess.Mother Goose and Grimm, 11/2/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261102mgg.jpg" />I am ignoring whatever joke they’re attempting to implement here, but I do want to point out that it’s now strip canon that the title characters can just drop by the office of Satan, the great Adversary, which is clearly in the depths of Hell itself, whenever they feel like. Not sure if we’re meant to understand that they have the power to move back and forth across the veil that separates the worlds of the living and the dead, or if they in fact inhabit Hell full time themselves, and the various misadventures we see them get into represent some kind of ironic punishment tailored specifically for them, due to their sins.Mary Worth, 11/2/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261102maryworth.jpg" />It’s day 17 of the siege by various law enforcement agencies that began when Mary <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/11/excited-for-mary-worth-to-get-kafka-seque/#mary" target="_blank">hung Nelly Fenele’s flayed skin</a> on the gates of Charterstone as a warning to those who would dare betray her. The feds thought it would take only a few days for the hungry residents to turn on the woman the media is calling “The Butcher of Santa Royale,” but the produce from the Charterstone garden has so far been enough to keep everyone loyal. Thank goodness for mild California weather!</div> Excited for Mary Worth to get Kafka-seque https://joshreads.com/2026/11/excited-for-mary-worth-to-get-kafka-seque/ Panel from Slylock Fox, 11/1/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261101slylockpanel.jpg" />My first reaction to this panel was a very strong and visceral feeling that animals wearing fursuits of other animals is just wrong. It’s wrong! And probably you’re going to barge on in and say, ooh, Josh, are you saying that rabbits and lions and mice and foxes are all the same category of thing, as opposed to humans? Are you saying they all look alike to you? And yes, that’s what I’m saying, and at some level they believe it too! Why else does Slylock think that it’s OK to dress up as a mouse who’s as big as a fox? You’re saying he doesn’t “see” size? C’mon now.Shoe, 11/1/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261101shoe.jpg" />Kudos to the artist for adding the little floating dots in Biz’s field of vision in the first panel. That’s a subtle hint that all this talk about “do[ing] it for me” and “the night [being] young” are code for drinking. He’s drunk all he can, because he’s old and can’t hold his liquor anymore! And now he’s probably going to drive home! Good times.<a name="mary"></a>Mary Worth, 11/1/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261101maryworth.jpg" />I love how Mary methodically worked her way through all the <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/tuesday-diatribes/#mary" target="_blank">dweebs</a> and <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/theological-interplanetary-and-medical-problems/#mary" target="_blank">idiot</a> <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/stop-trying-to-make-mrs-w-happen-also/#mary" target="_blank">morons</a> in her life, and each time another name was named, her thought was “Well, I guess I’m going to have to figure out who they heard this outlandish rumor from.” But as soon as Tommy announced that Nelly was his source, Nelly whom she barely knows (though she frames that relationship in her mind as Nelly rarely taking the golden opportunity to interact with Mary) — the target was acquired. Nelly’s going to pay. Nelly’s going to suffer. Does Nelly think she’s miserable? She doesn’t know the meaning of misery — but she will, and soon.</div> Mary Worth Shoe Slylock Fox https://joshreads.com/2026/11/excited-for-mary-worth-to-get-kafka-seque/#comments https://joshreads.com/?p=49588 Sun, 01 Nov 2026 12:27:40 +0000 Panel from Slylock Fox, 11/1/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261101slylockpanel.jpg" />My first reaction to this panel was a very strong and visceral feeling that animals wearing fursuits of other animals is just wrong. It’s wrong! And probably you’re going to barge on in and say, ooh, Josh, are you saying that rabbits and lions and mice and foxes are all the same category of thing, as opposed to humans? Are you saying they all look alike to you? And yes, that’s what I’m saying, and at some level they believe it too! Why else does Slylock think that it’s OK to dress up as a mouse who’s as big as a fox? You’re saying he doesn’t “see” size? C’mon now.Shoe, 11/1/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261101shoe.jpg" />Kudos to the artist for adding the little floating dots in Biz’s field of vision in the first panel. That’s a subtle hint that all this talk about “do[ing] it for me” and “the night [being] young” are code for drinking. He’s drunk all he can, because he’s old and can’t hold his liquor anymore! And now he’s probably going to drive home! Good times.<a name="mary"></a>Mary Worth, 11/1/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/11/i261101maryworth.jpg" />I love how Mary methodically worked her way through all the <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/tuesday-diatribes/#mary" target="_blank">dweebs</a> and <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/theological-interplanetary-and-medical-problems/#mary" target="_blank">idiot</a> <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/10/stop-trying-to-make-mrs-w-happen-also/#mary" target="_blank">morons</a> in her life, and each time another name was named, her thought was “Well, I guess I’m going to have to figure out who they heard this outlandish rumor from.” But as soon as Tommy announced that Nelly was his source, Nelly whom she barely knows (though she frames that relationship in her mind as Nelly rarely taking the golden opportunity to interact with Mary) — the target was acquired. Nelly’s going to pay. Nelly’s going to suffer. Does Nelly think she’s miserable? She doesn’t know the meaning of misery — but she will, and soon.</div> I mean, I judge a certain amount, I guess https://joshreads.com/2026/10/i-mean-i-judge-a-certain-amount-i-guess/ The Phantom, 10/31/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261031phantom.jpg" />Hey, sorry I haven’t been keeping you up on The Phantom, but the short version of what you missed is that transparent Elon Musk standin Ian Mollusk’s AI system has gone rogue, <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/09/friday-terrors/" target="_blank">melting the Python’s brain</a> and leaving him feeble and docile rather than the anti-Phantom killer Mollusk envisioned, and also escaping into Mollusk’s refrigerator somehow. Today’s strip honestly tickles me because, yeah, the Nomad’s <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/04/facial-expressions-and-other-matters/#phantom" target="_blank">been in Gitmo for years</a> and, yeah, a lot’s happened in that time! They don’t let you read the newspaper in there! He’s still catching up!Mary Worth, 10/31/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261031maryworth.jpg" />Really love how Tommy realized at the last possible moment that he has to say that he never believed Mary and Ian were actually having an affair. Obviously Mary knows better, but he just got under the wire for plausible deniability so Mary isn’t honor bound to eviscerate him right here at his place of employment, yet.Hagar the Horrible, 10/31/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261031hth.jpg" />Oh, also, it’s Halloween! Got any big plans? Hagar and Helga decided to host an Eyes Wide Shut style masked orgy at their house, which wouldn’t have been my choice but, you know what, I don’t judge.</div> Hagar the Horrible Mary Worth Phantom https://joshreads.com/2026/10/i-mean-i-judge-a-certain-amount-i-guess/#comments https://joshreads.com/?p=49581 Sat, 31 Oct 2026 11:25:32 +0000 The Phantom, 10/31/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261031phantom.jpg" />Hey, sorry I haven’t been keeping you up on The Phantom, but the short version of what you missed is that transparent Elon Musk standin Ian Mollusk’s AI system has gone rogue, <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/09/friday-terrors/" target="_blank">melting the Python’s brain</a> and leaving him feeble and docile rather than the anti-Phantom killer Mollusk envisioned, and also escaping into Mollusk’s refrigerator somehow. Today’s strip honestly tickles me because, yeah, the Nomad’s <a href="https://joshreads.com/2026/04/facial-expressions-and-other-matters/#phantom" target="_blank">been in Gitmo for years</a> and, yeah, a lot’s happened in that time! They don’t let you read the newspaper in there! He’s still catching up!Mary Worth, 10/31/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261031maryworth.jpg" />Really love how Tommy realized at the last possible moment that he has to say that he never believed Mary and Ian were actually having an affair. Obviously Mary knows better, but he just got under the wire for plausible deniability so Mary isn’t honor bound to eviscerate him right here at his place of employment, yet.Hagar the Horrible, 10/31/26<img decoding="async" src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261031hth.jpg" />Oh, also, it’s Halloween! Got any big plans? Hagar and Helga decided to host an Eyes Wide Shut style masked orgy at their house, which wouldn’t have been my choice but, you know what, I don’t judge.</div> Metapost: Spooktacular COTW https://joshreads.com/2026/10/metapost-spooktacular-cotw/ As we head into Halloween … the scariest night of the year … please enjoy your creepy, ookie comment of the week!<blockquote> “I must believe, in these dark days, that along with walking the dog, Saul puts on a full suit to trim tree branches and return his ‘broken’ cell phone (it’s turned off). Live your bit, Saul.” –A Grave Mind <img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261027maryworth.jpg" /></blockquote>And the very SCARILY FUNNY runners up!<blockquote> “If you fashion a chunk of flesh into a car, the ghost will be forced to possess the vehicle and compel it to move. On the one hand, it’s an atrocity to capture an immortal soul and bind it to labour for all eternity. On the other hand, it’s good for the environment.” –Schroduck<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261025heath.jpg" />“Oh, just dump some dead leaves on the grill and burn them, Hi. No one will mind! Have a leaf huffing party. Definitely invite Thirsty.” –made of wince<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261025hinlois.jpg" />“People will gossip about things they don’t comprehend, like me being attracted to a woman over 50. Speaking of which, I see you have a birthday coming up, but never mind that.” –Taylor Handsome<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261025maryworth.jpg" />“The butcher explaining that this ham is haunted leads me to believe he’s the one who sold it to Heathcliff after the cat came in and nonverbally asked for meat so infested with the spirits of the dead it could be used as a means of self-propelled transportation. Heathcliff wanting such a whimsical thing is par for the course, but the fact that the butcher was able to provide it makes me think his MEAT store is hiding some dark secrets. What other unnatural flesh does he have in the back of his shop, where his normal customers can’t see it? Possessed pork? Ghostly guanciale?” –Vulpes<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261025heath.jpg" />“The Rex Morgan narration box asked ‘Who shall we drop in on next?’ and then didn’t wait for an answer. Rude.” –matt w<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261026rmmd.jpg" />“Pluggers regret so many of their life choices; this is simply one of them.” –TheDiva<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261026pluggers.jpg" />“Ah, yes, two children running their Halloween algorithms on a tablet. Alboorithms? Alghostrithms! Anyhow, normal kid behavior! Happy Halloween!” –Victor Von<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261026rmmd.jpg" />“Was it that obvious? I was hoping for a circular conversation that went nowhere for a couple of hours while we all got frustrated and eventually agreed to just go our separate ways so we can justify a bad review on Yelp.” –Anonymous<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261027blondie.jpg" />“‘Was it that obvious?’ Yes, you are in a legacy strip, jokes need to be spelled out or they won’t work (they don’t work anyway)!” –Ettorre<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261027blondie.jpg" />“I was about to comment that Superman on the shelf there has a horrifically broken humerus, until I realized that there’s no S on the chest insignia. Rather, there’s a C, possibly for Calcium Deficiency Man. But on closer inspection, the shopkeeper’s arms are equally mangled. So this is just a world where the majority of the population suffers from arm-rickets, I suppose.” –Lauralot<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261028dtm.jpg" />“The comics today gave us a glimpse of Dustin’s dad’s nipple, and the angry mob will be convening at noon. I have a few torches and a couple of extra pitchforks for anyone who needs them.” –Tabby Lavalamp<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261028dustin.jpg" />“Imagination, child? Oh, yes, we have items that run on imagination, belief, awe, and terror. Toys that will raise your soul to the heights of Paradise and the depths of the Abyss. Toys of wonder and delight and shock and depravity. Are you ready, child? Truly ready? Then I present you with this … fidget spinner. Now get the fuck out of my store.” –Voshkod<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261028dtm.jpg" />“You want to talk about truly amazing technology, Dag? Your own wife has a robot clone of herself capable of pretending to converse with you. It comes preloaded with phrases like ‘I’ll say!’ and ‘Don’t get ahead of yourself, dear.’” –Joe Blevins<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261028blondie.jpg" />“Mary will stop at nothing in her quest to find the rumor-spreader at Charterstone — including walking into Dawn’s bedroom unannounced. Hey, lady, get a warrant.” –TK<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261029maryworth.jpg" />“‘Bring Your Own Booze?’ ‘No. Birds You Ogle Briefly.’” –Bob Tice<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261029shoe.jpg" />“How can you not be impressed by the utter genius of Mary Worth? Not only did they throw another long, drawn-out, utterly boring storyline with a stubby, dissatisfying resolution right in our faces, but now they’re making us sit through it again — backwards!” –Boomer<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261029maryworth.jpg" />“I like to imagine that these quotes pop into Rev. Croom’s head in the form of one of those scrolling electronic sign boards. He has no control over it, might as well just sit back and enjoy the show!” –Peanut Gallery<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261029hnj.jpg" />“Hope Mary likes 20 minutes of Tommy looking thoughtful and going, ‘Let’s see … I know it was from a … person. They had eyes, and … I think hands. No, they had hands. I’m pretty sure.’” –Dan<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261030maryworth.jpg" />“Where did you hear that false rumor, Tommy? I repeat — false rumor. No, I’m not worried about the true one, Mr. Allora and I find it titillating to hear the speculations about our activities. It spices things up.” –CanuckDownSouth<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261030maryworth.jpg" />“Smokey is still capable of whacking potential meals with his shovel and pureeing them into smoothies, a fact that mockers would do well to remember.” –MKay<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261030mgg.jpg" />“The onesie may say ‘clown,’ but the hat shrieks ‘hobo.’ And I suppose the mask adds subtle hints of crazed supervillain. With such mismatched accoutrements, it is clear that Jeffy, as usual, doesn’t know what day it is and is just blurting out guesses.” –But What Do I Know? <img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261030famcirc.jpg" /></blockquote>Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a <a href="https://joshreads.com/subscribe-to-the-comics-curmudgeon-newsletter/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber</a>! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a <a href="https://joshreads.com/membership-account/membership-checkout/?level=1" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber</a>! You can get each day’s post ad-free via <a href="https://www.patreon.com/jfruh" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Patreon</a> if that’s your style! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my <a href="https://joshreads.com/?page_id=524" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">tip jar</a>! Thanks to all for your support and readership!</div> metaposts https://joshreads.com/2026/10/metapost-spooktacular-cotw/#comments https://joshreads.com/?p=49577 Fri, 30 Oct 2026 14:56:43 +0000 As we head into Halloween … the scariest night of the year … please enjoy your creepy, ookie comment of the week!<blockquote> “I must believe, in these dark days, that along with walking the dog, Saul puts on a full suit to trim tree branches and return his ‘broken’ cell phone (it’s turned off). Live your bit, Saul.” –A Grave Mind <img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261027maryworth.jpg" /></blockquote>And the very SCARILY FUNNY runners up!<blockquote> “If you fashion a chunk of flesh into a car, the ghost will be forced to possess the vehicle and compel it to move. On the one hand, it’s an atrocity to capture an immortal soul and bind it to labour for all eternity. On the other hand, it’s good for the environment.” –Schroduck<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261025heath.jpg" />“Oh, just dump some dead leaves on the grill and burn them, Hi. No one will mind! Have a leaf huffing party. Definitely invite Thirsty.” –made of wince<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261025hinlois.jpg" />“People will gossip about things they don’t comprehend, like me being attracted to a woman over 50. Speaking of which, I see you have a birthday coming up, but never mind that.” –Taylor Handsome<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261025maryworth.jpg" />“The butcher explaining that this ham is haunted leads me to believe he’s the one who sold it to Heathcliff after the cat came in and nonverbally asked for meat so infested with the spirits of the dead it could be used as a means of self-propelled transportation. Heathcliff wanting such a whimsical thing is par for the course, but the fact that the butcher was able to provide it makes me think his MEAT store is hiding some dark secrets. What other unnatural flesh does he have in the back of his shop, where his normal customers can’t see it? Possessed pork? Ghostly guanciale?” –Vulpes<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261025heath.jpg" />“The Rex Morgan narration box asked ‘Who shall we drop in on next?’ and then didn’t wait for an answer. Rude.” –matt w<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261026rmmd.jpg" />“Pluggers regret so many of their life choices; this is simply one of them.” –TheDiva<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261026pluggers.jpg" />“Ah, yes, two children running their Halloween algorithms on a tablet. Alboorithms? Alghostrithms! Anyhow, normal kid behavior! Happy Halloween!” –Victor Von<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261026rmmd.jpg" />“Was it that obvious? I was hoping for a circular conversation that went nowhere for a couple of hours while we all got frustrated and eventually agreed to just go our separate ways so we can justify a bad review on Yelp.” –Anonymous<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261027blondie.jpg" />“‘Was it that obvious?’ Yes, you are in a legacy strip, jokes need to be spelled out or they won’t work (they don’t work anyway)!” –Ettorre<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261027blondie.jpg" />“I was about to comment that Superman on the shelf there has a horrifically broken humerus, until I realized that there’s no S on the chest insignia. Rather, there’s a C, possibly for Calcium Deficiency Man. But on closer inspection, the shopkeeper’s arms are equally mangled. So this is just a world where the majority of the population suffers from arm-rickets, I suppose.” –Lauralot<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261028dtm.jpg" />“The comics today gave us a glimpse of Dustin’s dad’s nipple, and the angry mob will be convening at noon. I have a few torches and a couple of extra pitchforks for anyone who needs them.” –Tabby Lavalamp<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261028dustin.jpg" />“Imagination, child? Oh, yes, we have items that run on imagination, belief, awe, and terror. Toys that will raise your soul to the heights of Paradise and the depths of the Abyss. Toys of wonder and delight and shock and depravity. Are you ready, child? Truly ready? Then I present you with this … fidget spinner. Now get the fuck out of my store.” –Voshkod<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261028dtm.jpg" />“You want to talk about truly amazing technology, Dag? Your own wife has a robot clone of herself capable of pretending to converse with you. It comes preloaded with phrases like ‘I’ll say!’ and ‘Don’t get ahead of yourself, dear.’” –Joe Blevins<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261028blondie.jpg" />“Mary will stop at nothing in her quest to find the rumor-spreader at Charterstone — including walking into Dawn’s bedroom unannounced. Hey, lady, get a warrant.” –TK<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261029maryworth.jpg" />“‘Bring Your Own Booze?’ ‘No. Birds You Ogle Briefly.’” –Bob Tice<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261029shoe.jpg" />“How can you not be impressed by the utter genius of Mary Worth? Not only did they throw another long, drawn-out, utterly boring storyline with a stubby, dissatisfying resolution right in our faces, but now they’re making us sit through it again — backwards!” –Boomer<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261029maryworth.jpg" />“I like to imagine that these quotes pop into Rev. Croom’s head in the form of one of those scrolling electronic sign boards. He has no control over it, might as well just sit back and enjoy the show!” –Peanut Gallery<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261029hnj.jpg" />“Hope Mary likes 20 minutes of Tommy looking thoughtful and going, ‘Let’s see … I know it was from a … person. They had eyes, and … I think hands. No, they had hands. I’m pretty sure.’” –Dan<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261030maryworth.jpg" />“Where did you hear that false rumor, Tommy? I repeat — false rumor. No, I’m not worried about the true one, Mr. Allora and I find it titillating to hear the speculations about our activities. It spices things up.” –CanuckDownSouth<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261030maryworth.jpg" />“Smokey is still capable of whacking potential meals with his shovel and pureeing them into smoothies, a fact that mockers would do well to remember.” –MKay<img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261030mgg.jpg" />“The onesie may say ‘clown,’ but the hat shrieks ‘hobo.’ And I suppose the mask adds subtle hints of crazed supervillain. With such mismatched accoutrements, it is clear that Jeffy, as usual, doesn’t know what day it is and is just blurting out guesses.” –But What Do I Know? <img src="https://joshreads.com/images/26/10/i261030famcirc.jpg" /></blockquote>Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a <a href="https://joshreads.com/subscribe-to-the-comics-curmudgeon-newsletter/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber</a>! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a <a href="https://joshreads.com/membership-account/membership-checkout/?level=1" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber</a>! You can get each day’s post ad-free via <a href="https://www.patreon.com/jfruh" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Patreon</a> if that’s your style! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my <a href="https://joshreads.com/?page_id=524" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">tip jar</a>! Thanks to all for your support and readership!</div>